I got the OK from my midwife to start exercising, light exercising. We've been walking when it's nice out, but today I did some pilates and some weights. I am SO out of shape it's ridiculous. My muscles were cramping almost immediately and I'm already sore. When I was 19 and had mono, I was in bed for 5 weeks straight and lost a ton of weight - mostly muscle mass - and was out of shape after that. I needed a while to build up my muscles and my stamina and endurance. This time, I spent about 3 weeks doing nothing and the result is the same. I can't believe it.
So I'm starting from scratch and I'm determined to get back to where I was. I'm not planning on running a marathon any time soon, but I would really like to lose some weight (slowly, guaranteed) and get strong again. In another 3 weeks, I should get the OK to do more than just light exercise and I plan on starting the P90X workout that J (and the whole world) is doing. I also plan on running again and maybe swimming.
Swimming was all I had there for about 3 months and I'm finding I'm missing it. It's interesting, missing something like swimming even though I'm not a very good swimmer. I also miss drinking tea and eating pineapple and our nightly walks. Thankfully we've started walking again and now I can lie on my stomach and bend over without having a watermelon in the way. I don't have to get up to pee every hour during the night and hugs are closer and better than ever.
Lots of changes and more to come.
Saturday, September 26
Thursday, September 24
Flying by
Somehow the days are flying by. I don't quite understand it because I'm not doing a whole lot. I sleep when I can, I feel like most of my awake time is spent feeding my boy, and then it's tomorrow. It can be a little depressing.
Being pregnant and being a new parent is strange. You don't feel like yourself: your body is doing things that you never imagined and your emotions and hormones are going wild. It can be so overwhelming. I look down at my little guy I just spent an hour feeding only to realize I would be doing it again in two hours. And three hours after that. Sometimes I feel trapped. But then I remember that I signed up for this and man, he's cute.
Where was I? Right, the passing of time. It's true - the days are going by too quickly. J's birthday was last week and was probably the saddest birthday he's had in a while. He hardly slept the night before and there were no celebrations on the actual day. I'm hoping we made up for it by having S&L&R and A&S over for dinner and cake and then having a birthday dinner with his family. J, I'm sorry your birthday got overshadowed.
The dinner with his family was the first time we'd left the house for more than two hours. It required a couple of diaper changes and a feeding outside the house, or "in the wild" as J likes to say. Apart from all the screaming, both went rather well. Soon, I won't hesitate to go wherever, but for now, baby steps.
All of a sudden Baby J is two weeks old and we're taking him to the midwives office. I got the go ahead to start light exercise - yoga or pilates and walking. And he's healthy and has gained more weight - he's somewhere between 8 pounds 4.5 ounces and 7 ounces - and he passed his hearing test. He managed to pee all over J while we were there, but that's nothing compared to what he did last week. I was in the bathroom when I hear either laughing or sobbing coming from the nursery. I run in to see J holding the kid upright while he's peeing everywhere. Everywhere. J's laughing and I'm laughing and the kid is crying. Fun times.
I went out by myself for the first time the other day. That was my first mistake. A new mom should not go anywhere without her baby. When I got to the cash, the cashier said "You aren't pregnant, are you?" No lady, my baby's at home. "Oh," she said, "I didn't think you were but you're wearing maternity jeans." Truth is I'm hesitant to try on anything but mat clothes because I don't think they'll fit yet. I don't need that. She then went on to tell me that some store has great pants that don't have buttons or zippers. Thanks, but I'll stick with my mat pants. I already own them. And since the days are flying by, I'll soon be back down to my pre-pregnancy weight anyways.
Being pregnant and being a new parent is strange. You don't feel like yourself: your body is doing things that you never imagined and your emotions and hormones are going wild. It can be so overwhelming. I look down at my little guy I just spent an hour feeding only to realize I would be doing it again in two hours. And three hours after that. Sometimes I feel trapped. But then I remember that I signed up for this and man, he's cute.
Where was I? Right, the passing of time. It's true - the days are going by too quickly. J's birthday was last week and was probably the saddest birthday he's had in a while. He hardly slept the night before and there were no celebrations on the actual day. I'm hoping we made up for it by having S&L&R and A&S over for dinner and cake and then having a birthday dinner with his family. J, I'm sorry your birthday got overshadowed.
The dinner with his family was the first time we'd left the house for more than two hours. It required a couple of diaper changes and a feeding outside the house, or "in the wild" as J likes to say. Apart from all the screaming, both went rather well. Soon, I won't hesitate to go wherever, but for now, baby steps.
All of a sudden Baby J is two weeks old and we're taking him to the midwives office. I got the go ahead to start light exercise - yoga or pilates and walking. And he's healthy and has gained more weight - he's somewhere between 8 pounds 4.5 ounces and 7 ounces - and he passed his hearing test. He managed to pee all over J while we were there, but that's nothing compared to what he did last week. I was in the bathroom when I hear either laughing or sobbing coming from the nursery. I run in to see J holding the kid upright while he's peeing everywhere. Everywhere. J's laughing and I'm laughing and the kid is crying. Fun times.
I went out by myself for the first time the other day. That was my first mistake. A new mom should not go anywhere without her baby. When I got to the cash, the cashier said "You aren't pregnant, are you?" No lady, my baby's at home. "Oh," she said, "I didn't think you were but you're wearing maternity jeans." Truth is I'm hesitant to try on anything but mat clothes because I don't think they'll fit yet. I don't need that. She then went on to tell me that some store has great pants that don't have buttons or zippers. Thanks, but I'll stick with my mat pants. I already own them. And since the days are flying by, I'll soon be back down to my pre-pregnancy weight anyways.
Saturday, September 19
Week 1: The ups and the downs
The first week of being a parent was amazing but exhausting. The days are flying by but I'm not getting much done - though I guess I should count showering once a day an accomplishment. I'm quite happy with my body and happy with the care we've gotten from the midwives. I'm happy.
We chose to stay in the hospital overnight and into the next day so that Baby J could get some blood taken at 24 hours. We didn't realize we had to wait for the results as well so we ended up leaving after 10pm the next day. It wasn't too bad though. We spent the night being checked on by nurses every shift and just getting used to having a little person to care for. Our room was freezing and J's "bed" wasn't too comfy, but we survived. We were able to see our friends S&J who were just down the hall with their new little man, C. We saw the midwives in the afternoon and got the blood work done when it was time. The results were good so we were free to go. After dressing our little man in clothes for the first time and having the car seat inspected we were good to go. I was so happy to be heading home.
On the way out I weighed myself. I put on 38 pounds over the 9 months and the only stretch mark I got is where my belly button is pierced. I kept seeing myself in the mirror in the bathroom after the birth and marvelling at my little tummy. The weight gain was gradual, but the change afterwards was immediate. I was curious just how much weight I'd lost, knowing it had to be more than 7 pounds and 10 ounces. Turns out it was 14 pounds. And after the first week I've lost another 4. The first time J and I hugged was great and it's only going to get better. 20 pounds better.
Breast feeding is apparently good for losing weight. Some people do it and others don't and it can be a heated topic, but in my mind it's a natural thing and much cheaper and easier than formula feeding. I wanted to breast feed Baby J and was pretty upset when it wasn't going well. I was pumping and J was using a syringe and feeding tube to feed the baby. The midwives came to see us at home on days 2 and 3 but by day 3 I was dealing with engorgement - my milk came in but because I wasn't able to feed well it had nowhere to go. Let's just say that I was in a ton of pain and we tried everything. After about 36 hours and all of the things we tried, the swelling went down and I was able to try breast feeding again. By the end of the first week we started to get the hang of it. Goal #1 was to establish breast feeding, meaning no more pumping and no more having J feed the kid. Done! Goal #2 is to get better at it. Still a work in progress.
The midwives have been great. Like I said, we saw them in the hospital the day after the baby was born and at home the next two days. They check both me and Baby J out every time we see them. Baby J is doing what babies should do and I'm healing well. Going with midwifery care versus an OB is another topic that divides people and obviously we went with the midwives and are so happy we did. I would recommend it to anyone for their low-risk pregnancy. We see them again but in the office when Baby J is 2 weeks old.
J and I have had many moments where we're laughing hysterically over things we're done in our sleep-deprived state or things that Baby J has done. Two times I panicked because I didn't know where Baby J was. I'd wake up and find myself alone. I'd go and find J and ask him where the baby was. He wouldn't know. How could he not know?! Turns out the kid was always close by and safe, but man, those few seconds were awful each time.
We do make a great team though. We tag-teamed feeding for the whole week and have each managed to shower every day. We're sleeping enough to function, though not enough to not be stupid and forgetful. We left eggs boiling on the stove until the water was almost gone for example.
We are so lucky to have people come to see us and help out with things - food especially. I'm not great at asking for things, but I did and you all came through. Thank you. It's so nice to have family and friends we can depend on. It's also nice to show off our little man to everyone.
We chose to stay in the hospital overnight and into the next day so that Baby J could get some blood taken at 24 hours. We didn't realize we had to wait for the results as well so we ended up leaving after 10pm the next day. It wasn't too bad though. We spent the night being checked on by nurses every shift and just getting used to having a little person to care for. Our room was freezing and J's "bed" wasn't too comfy, but we survived. We were able to see our friends S&J who were just down the hall with their new little man, C. We saw the midwives in the afternoon and got the blood work done when it was time. The results were good so we were free to go. After dressing our little man in clothes for the first time and having the car seat inspected we were good to go. I was so happy to be heading home.
On the way out I weighed myself. I put on 38 pounds over the 9 months and the only stretch mark I got is where my belly button is pierced. I kept seeing myself in the mirror in the bathroom after the birth and marvelling at my little tummy. The weight gain was gradual, but the change afterwards was immediate. I was curious just how much weight I'd lost, knowing it had to be more than 7 pounds and 10 ounces. Turns out it was 14 pounds. And after the first week I've lost another 4. The first time J and I hugged was great and it's only going to get better. 20 pounds better.
Breast feeding is apparently good for losing weight. Some people do it and others don't and it can be a heated topic, but in my mind it's a natural thing and much cheaper and easier than formula feeding. I wanted to breast feed Baby J and was pretty upset when it wasn't going well. I was pumping and J was using a syringe and feeding tube to feed the baby. The midwives came to see us at home on days 2 and 3 but by day 3 I was dealing with engorgement - my milk came in but because I wasn't able to feed well it had nowhere to go. Let's just say that I was in a ton of pain and we tried everything. After about 36 hours and all of the things we tried, the swelling went down and I was able to try breast feeding again. By the end of the first week we started to get the hang of it. Goal #1 was to establish breast feeding, meaning no more pumping and no more having J feed the kid. Done! Goal #2 is to get better at it. Still a work in progress.
The midwives have been great. Like I said, we saw them in the hospital the day after the baby was born and at home the next two days. They check both me and Baby J out every time we see them. Baby J is doing what babies should do and I'm healing well. Going with midwifery care versus an OB is another topic that divides people and obviously we went with the midwives and are so happy we did. I would recommend it to anyone for their low-risk pregnancy. We see them again but in the office when Baby J is 2 weeks old.
J and I have had many moments where we're laughing hysterically over things we're done in our sleep-deprived state or things that Baby J has done. Two times I panicked because I didn't know where Baby J was. I'd wake up and find myself alone. I'd go and find J and ask him where the baby was. He wouldn't know. How could he not know?! Turns out the kid was always close by and safe, but man, those few seconds were awful each time.
We do make a great team though. We tag-teamed feeding for the whole week and have each managed to shower every day. We're sleeping enough to function, though not enough to not be stupid and forgetful. We left eggs boiling on the stove until the water was almost gone for example.
We are so lucky to have people come to see us and help out with things - food especially. I'm not great at asking for things, but I did and you all came through. Thank you. It's so nice to have family and friends we can depend on. It's also nice to show off our little man to everyone.
Friday, September 18
Birth Story
There's so much that I want to say, but I really should start at the beginning. Hence, the birth story.
You all know that Baby J was born Tuesday, September 8th at 5:02pm. He weighed 7 pounds 10 ounces and was 21 inches long. Now, for what I didn't have time to type the first time.
My water broke at 6pm on Monday, September 7. I took Tylenol and Gravol to get some sleep that night. I woke up at 4am the next morning with my first contraction. I spent the next 3.5 hours breathing through them and sleeping in between, but by 7:30am I was scared to fall back to sleep because they were coming quicker and hurting. I woke up J who immediately jumped into action, grabbing his watch and a notebook to write down the times. My contractions were 4-6 minutes apart lasting 30-60 seconds. I was able to breathe through them for a while, but the pain was getting worse and worse. We tried different positions and called the midwife at around 9:30am. She said that they weren't close enough or regular enough yet to go to the hospital. I tried the bath, which totally slowed them right down so I got out. Eventually they sped up again and we hooked up the TENS machine, which is a nerve stimulator thing that basically confuses your brain and lessens the pain from contractions. It was like I was that bad little kid whose parents have to have on a leash in the mall.
The contractions sped up and got more painful so we called the midwife again around 11:30am and were told to head to the hospital. J scrambled around getting everything together and we headed out. It felt like we hit every red light on the way and every single pothole. I was having contractions the whole way and again right outside the hospital, and another in the elevator. It was only one flight up so I finished up my contraction squatting on the elevator floor in front of a bunch of concerned people.
We met the midwives in triage and got assessed. I was 3-4cm dilated (10 is go-time). We were admitted and moved into our room. I had another contraction on the way and was squatting in the hallway. We got into the room, after a few contractions I tried the tub but got the urge to push so quickly got out. Had to have my blood taken, which they somehow did while I was contracting.
Soon I was on all fours on the bed labouring like mad. Three hours of labouring in different positions without drugs. An hour of that was trying to not push because things weren't quite ready for pushing. Fighting that urge was one of the hardest things I've had to do. Finally I was able to push and after about an hour of pushing and the most intense pain of my life, including muscles cramping and the occasional emotional breakdown, Baby J was born.
He was whooshed - according to J - onto my stomach where he stayed for the first 2 hours. J got to cut the cord. I was given some drugs to help with the placenta - the quick labour and muscle failure meant my body couldn't do it without them. I was stitched up while we stared out our new little man. It was unreal, having a squirming little person on my chest, squeaking and burbling and sometimes crying. Jerky arm movements and head twitches that were all brand new.
Eventually they took him to be weighed and measured and tested (reflexes and other stuff). He passed with flying colours and was back in my arms in no time.
J and the midwives were awesome for the labour and delivery. I was at the point of physical exhaustion, muscles cramping and failing in the middle of contractions, and mental exhaustion, thinking there was no way I could do this and was I going to have to have a c-section? Why didn't I ask for drugs when I had the chance? Ow! But the three of them helped me through it all. It was the most intense experience of my life. And apparently I don't even remember half of it - J told me that I was myself for about half the time and primal-get-this-done K the rest of the time. He was telling me all sorts of things I did and said that I don't remember.
I'm very proud of myself for accomplishing my goal of having a drug-free labour, I'm so proud of J for being my rock through the whole thing, and I'm incredibly proud of my new little guy who is absolutely perfect. Welcome to the world, Baby J.
You all know that Baby J was born Tuesday, September 8th at 5:02pm. He weighed 7 pounds 10 ounces and was 21 inches long. Now, for what I didn't have time to type the first time.
My water broke at 6pm on Monday, September 7. I took Tylenol and Gravol to get some sleep that night. I woke up at 4am the next morning with my first contraction. I spent the next 3.5 hours breathing through them and sleeping in between, but by 7:30am I was scared to fall back to sleep because they were coming quicker and hurting. I woke up J who immediately jumped into action, grabbing his watch and a notebook to write down the times. My contractions were 4-6 minutes apart lasting 30-60 seconds. I was able to breathe through them for a while, but the pain was getting worse and worse. We tried different positions and called the midwife at around 9:30am. She said that they weren't close enough or regular enough yet to go to the hospital. I tried the bath, which totally slowed them right down so I got out. Eventually they sped up again and we hooked up the TENS machine, which is a nerve stimulator thing that basically confuses your brain and lessens the pain from contractions. It was like I was that bad little kid whose parents have to have on a leash in the mall.
The contractions sped up and got more painful so we called the midwife again around 11:30am and were told to head to the hospital. J scrambled around getting everything together and we headed out. It felt like we hit every red light on the way and every single pothole. I was having contractions the whole way and again right outside the hospital, and another in the elevator. It was only one flight up so I finished up my contraction squatting on the elevator floor in front of a bunch of concerned people.
We met the midwives in triage and got assessed. I was 3-4cm dilated (10 is go-time). We were admitted and moved into our room. I had another contraction on the way and was squatting in the hallway. We got into the room, after a few contractions I tried the tub but got the urge to push so quickly got out. Had to have my blood taken, which they somehow did while I was contracting.
Soon I was on all fours on the bed labouring like mad. Three hours of labouring in different positions without drugs. An hour of that was trying to not push because things weren't quite ready for pushing. Fighting that urge was one of the hardest things I've had to do. Finally I was able to push and after about an hour of pushing and the most intense pain of my life, including muscles cramping and the occasional emotional breakdown, Baby J was born.
He was whooshed - according to J - onto my stomach where he stayed for the first 2 hours. J got to cut the cord. I was given some drugs to help with the placenta - the quick labour and muscle failure meant my body couldn't do it without them. I was stitched up while we stared out our new little man. It was unreal, having a squirming little person on my chest, squeaking and burbling and sometimes crying. Jerky arm movements and head twitches that were all brand new.
Eventually they took him to be weighed and measured and tested (reflexes and other stuff). He passed with flying colours and was back in my arms in no time.
J and the midwives were awesome for the labour and delivery. I was at the point of physical exhaustion, muscles cramping and failing in the middle of contractions, and mental exhaustion, thinking there was no way I could do this and was I going to have to have a c-section? Why didn't I ask for drugs when I had the chance? Ow! But the three of them helped me through it all. It was the most intense experience of my life. And apparently I don't even remember half of it - J told me that I was myself for about half the time and primal-get-this-done K the rest of the time. He was telling me all sorts of things I did and said that I don't remember.
I'm very proud of myself for accomplishing my goal of having a drug-free labour, I'm so proud of J for being my rock through the whole thing, and I'm incredibly proud of my new little guy who is absolutely perfect. Welcome to the world, Baby J.
Monday, September 14
Pictures!
I put up some pictures on my Picasa page. The address is http://picasaweb.google.com/MYREALNAME. You should see some folders. If you have problems, send me an email and I'll send the actual link. I'm debating whether to put any up on the blog. We shall see.
Friday, September 11
B-Day!
B-Day has come and baby J is here! I don't have much time for the internet or to post, but we seem to be doing better than I expected we would. J has been just incredible - first throughout the whole labour and delivery and now with the baby. I don't know what I would have done without him or what I would be doing now.
Labour was absolute hell. I can say that now because it's over. I survived but I'm not sure I'll ever forget the pain. It was quick and intense and drug-free. My muscles were on the verge of complete exhaustion and I was an emotional wreck but from the moment my water broke to the moment I had baby J on my chest was 23 hours. And only 13 of that I was in labour, 4 hours in the hospital. I have never felt anything so powerful and raw. Every now and then, I look at baby J and shake my head - I can't believe I did that. That we did that.
He's the cutest little thing. Well, bigger than I was expecting at 7 pounds 10 ounces at birth, but still so small. He's a super sleeper but not a champion eater. We're getting help from the midwives with feeding and have been trying to get him to latch without much success. J is feeding him expressed milk while I pump for the next time. Hello professional milk pumper, aka cow. Not the nicest feeling, but necessary.
We were worried about how Sandy would react and she was a little freaked at first, but she's slowly getting used to him. She's not fond of his startle reflex (quick movement) or when he cries and cries. She actually yells and yells, like saying "hey, he's crying! Do something!"
We're slowly settling into our new life, our new little family. And I'm getting used to my new body.. it's a neat thing. Pictures will be up soon on Picasa, one is already on Facebook so go have a look.
Labour was absolute hell. I can say that now because it's over. I survived but I'm not sure I'll ever forget the pain. It was quick and intense and drug-free. My muscles were on the verge of complete exhaustion and I was an emotional wreck but from the moment my water broke to the moment I had baby J on my chest was 23 hours. And only 13 of that I was in labour, 4 hours in the hospital. I have never felt anything so powerful and raw. Every now and then, I look at baby J and shake my head - I can't believe I did that. That we did that.
He's the cutest little thing. Well, bigger than I was expecting at 7 pounds 10 ounces at birth, but still so small. He's a super sleeper but not a champion eater. We're getting help from the midwives with feeding and have been trying to get him to latch without much success. J is feeding him expressed milk while I pump for the next time. Hello professional milk pumper, aka cow. Not the nicest feeling, but necessary.
We were worried about how Sandy would react and she was a little freaked at first, but she's slowly getting used to him. She's not fond of his startle reflex (quick movement) or when he cries and cries. She actually yells and yells, like saying "hey, he's crying! Do something!"
We're slowly settling into our new life, our new little family. And I'm getting used to my new body.. it's a neat thing. Pictures will be up soon on Picasa, one is already on Facebook so go have a look.
Friday, September 4
No apologies
Today is like Boxing Day - let me explain. Yesterday, my due date, B-Day, was a little like Christmas. Only Christmas didn't happen. I tried my best to not get attached to that date, knowing it was only an estimate, knowing that most babies aren't born on their due dates. But I got attached anyway. It's hard when everyone wants to know when you're due and won't take "the beginning of September" as an answer. Plus all the doctors and OBs and midwives and techs all asking the same question. So I went and got attached. September 3rd became my Christmas.
Like any little kid who loves Christmas I couldn't sleep B-Day Eve (September 2nd). I was up late, rocking on my exercise ball, convinced and hoping that I would wake up sometime during the night to my water breaking or the intense pain of contractions. I was ready. I was excited. It was almost Christmas!
I woke up to pee a bunch of times as per usual. Nothing. No signs that labour was starting. So I stayed in bed. J got up and left for work, asking if I was in labour before he left like he always does (he's cute that way - so excited for his little man to be born and actually quite looking forward to his role in this whole thing. I couldn't ask for anything more.) I figured that if I kept sleeping, eventually I would wake up in labour. That's the way these things work, right. It's Christmas Day after all!
I finally got out of bed after 11am. I'm not sure how I made it so long without eating. First thing I did was sit down at the computer to an email from Baby Center saying congratulations on my newborn. Ug. And then the messages and emails from everyone asking if the baby was here yet. It was too much. I was still getting over my disappointment over not having woken up in labour and then to have it rubbed in my face that there was a good chance B-Day would come and go without so much as a real contraction. Guess what, if I'm on the computer, chances are I'm not in the hospital and chances are I'm not caring for a new little person.
So I was grouchy and I won't apologize for that. I think it's understandable. I felt better after getting off my ass, getting some food and going out. I went to return a shirt I bought ($45 in my pocket) and then went and spent some money on a yoga mat for J who has started this insane workout and some paintings to put up in my bathroom (-$65 = -$20 total). Not bad. I also booked myself a massage and pedicure for today. I will have to cancel the appointment if I'm in labour but otherwise I get a nice relaxing massage and pretty toes.
For some reason, getting past yesterday feels good. Yesterday was all disappointment because it was Christmas without the fun, without the presents. Today is just another day and this baby will come when he's good and ready. I don't blame him. It's warm and comfy in there and it's a completely unknown and scary world out here. But really baby, we're ready for you. Sandy has checked out everything we have for you, slept on every surface that you may sleep on, checked every blanket for softness, pawed at the toys hanging from the swing you'll spend hours in. We're ready to meet you, our little squirming man. Any day now.
Like any little kid who loves Christmas I couldn't sleep B-Day Eve (September 2nd). I was up late, rocking on my exercise ball, convinced and hoping that I would wake up sometime during the night to my water breaking or the intense pain of contractions. I was ready. I was excited. It was almost Christmas!
I woke up to pee a bunch of times as per usual. Nothing. No signs that labour was starting. So I stayed in bed. J got up and left for work, asking if I was in labour before he left like he always does (he's cute that way - so excited for his little man to be born and actually quite looking forward to his role in this whole thing. I couldn't ask for anything more.) I figured that if I kept sleeping, eventually I would wake up in labour. That's the way these things work, right. It's Christmas Day after all!
I finally got out of bed after 11am. I'm not sure how I made it so long without eating. First thing I did was sit down at the computer to an email from Baby Center saying congratulations on my newborn. Ug. And then the messages and emails from everyone asking if the baby was here yet. It was too much. I was still getting over my disappointment over not having woken up in labour and then to have it rubbed in my face that there was a good chance B-Day would come and go without so much as a real contraction. Guess what, if I'm on the computer, chances are I'm not in the hospital and chances are I'm not caring for a new little person.
So I was grouchy and I won't apologize for that. I think it's understandable. I felt better after getting off my ass, getting some food and going out. I went to return a shirt I bought ($45 in my pocket) and then went and spent some money on a yoga mat for J who has started this insane workout and some paintings to put up in my bathroom (-$65 = -$20 total). Not bad. I also booked myself a massage and pedicure for today. I will have to cancel the appointment if I'm in labour but otherwise I get a nice relaxing massage and pretty toes.
For some reason, getting past yesterday feels good. Yesterday was all disappointment because it was Christmas without the fun, without the presents. Today is just another day and this baby will come when he's good and ready. I don't blame him. It's warm and comfy in there and it's a completely unknown and scary world out here. But really baby, we're ready for you. Sandy has checked out everything we have for you, slept on every surface that you may sleep on, checked every blanket for softness, pawed at the toys hanging from the swing you'll spend hours in. We're ready to meet you, our little squirming man. Any day now.
Thursday, September 3
B-Day
Today is B-Day. That's the estimated due date given by measuring the fetus early on in the pregnancy. It's the middle of a 5-day period according to the measurements. 75% of people go past their due date.
Guess what... baby isn't here yet. I'm still pregnant - huge, uncomfortable and getting impatient. I'm having a hard time being pleasant when a million people are asking if he's here yet. I'm sorry. Please forgive me.
Guess what... baby isn't here yet. I'm still pregnant - huge, uncomfortable and getting impatient. I'm having a hard time being pleasant when a million people are asking if he's here yet. I'm sorry. Please forgive me.
Monday, August 31
An Open Letter to Everyone
Dear Everyone,
I am pregnant and at times pretty emotional. I cry over things that would have never set me off before. I'm not telling you this so that you're on eggshells around me, afraid to say anything lest you bring on the waterworks, but please please please think before you speak.
Safe topics include the usual - the weather, the local sports team, complaining about work or coworkers. Unsafe topics include calling my not-yet born kid a brat. Just because it's the last day of August and you thought an August baby would be nice, does not mean that there is anything wrong.
My due date is Thursday and you would think that maybe it would be me who, having shared her body with this growing thing for the past nine months, would like this kid out yesterday. I'm practicing being patient knowing that this kid will come when he is good and ready, but my patience wears thin when I talk to people like you.
Sincerely,
batman
I am pregnant and at times pretty emotional. I cry over things that would have never set me off before. I'm not telling you this so that you're on eggshells around me, afraid to say anything lest you bring on the waterworks, but please please please think before you speak.
Safe topics include the usual - the weather, the local sports team, complaining about work or coworkers. Unsafe topics include calling my not-yet born kid a brat. Just because it's the last day of August and you thought an August baby would be nice, does not mean that there is anything wrong.
My due date is Thursday and you would think that maybe it would be me who, having shared her body with this growing thing for the past nine months, would like this kid out yesterday. I'm practicing being patient knowing that this kid will come when he is good and ready, but my patience wears thin when I talk to people like you.
Sincerely,
batman
Saturday, August 29
Thoughts
Ultrasound - We went for the ultrasound Thursday morning and everything is looking good according to the tech. And since we haven't heard from the midwife yet, we're assuming things are fine. We have another appointment Tuesday so we'll find out for sure then. I took the preliminary report the tech gave us and Googled all the results. The only thing that looked a little off to me was the amount of amniotic fluid. I don't know the units, but mine was measured at 7 and I read that less than 5-6 is considered too little and 8-18 is considered a good amount. What about 7?? Ah well, Tuesday will be here soon enough.
Work - After the ultrasound I went to work for a bit. I wanted to drop off a little gift for J&M who are expecting about a week after me. I was able to see a lot of people and I have to admit it was an ego boost when everyone told me how great I looked. Thank you, work friends. Then I went to lunch with 4 of them. After all that, I needed a huge nap. Sandy didn't mind.
Weather - All of a sudden, we went from having the AC on and the fan blowing at night to it being freezing cold. Honestly, the change was so dramatic and so quick that I really can't believe it. I was hoping that since we had such crappy weather June and July that late August and September and even October would be warm and beautiful. And now it's raining like mad. Both J and I thought we had animals living in the walls after all the noise from the wind and rain last night. Turns out pieces of the house that allow air in were loose. J crawled around in the attic and fixed the problem. Such a handy guy.
Birthdays - S&S are both August babies so we had dinner and cake last night at S&Ls place to celebrate. I did a great job barbecuing and burned the first bunch of hotdogs. Thankfully burgers take longer to cook so all was not lost. I seem to remember we were at the cottage around this time last year celebrating these birthdays by getting really drunk and skinny dipping. How things change....
Getting ready - There are things you can do to naturally induce labour. Ever since I hit 37 weeks, which is considered full term, I've been trying these things. Who knows if it's helping or if I'll be late no matter what I do. Either way, I've been drinking raspberry leaf tea, eating pineapple, eating spicy food, walking more, and some other things I'd rather not mention (but if you're really curious, do a Google search on the topic). What I've noticed is that my Braxton-Hicks contractions (practice contractions) have gotten more powerful and more frequent and I have a lot of pressure/pain down low. Last night, I felt off so I went to bed and just lay there thinking "If this is labour, we're not ready." About an hour later, I felt normal again and fell asleep. Today we went and got the playpen, where baby will likely sleep for the first bit (days to weeks to months, depending on things) and the diaper bag. I have things put aside for the hospital bag and have talked to our families about not coming to the hospital (we don't plan to be there long). A couple more things to do and organize and likely wash and then we will be completely ready. And when I say 'completely ready' I mean 'as ready as we'll ever be' for this life-altering event. J really wants to meet our squirming little man.
Work - After the ultrasound I went to work for a bit. I wanted to drop off a little gift for J&M who are expecting about a week after me. I was able to see a lot of people and I have to admit it was an ego boost when everyone told me how great I looked. Thank you, work friends. Then I went to lunch with 4 of them. After all that, I needed a huge nap. Sandy didn't mind.
Weather - All of a sudden, we went from having the AC on and the fan blowing at night to it being freezing cold. Honestly, the change was so dramatic and so quick that I really can't believe it. I was hoping that since we had such crappy weather June and July that late August and September and even October would be warm and beautiful. And now it's raining like mad. Both J and I thought we had animals living in the walls after all the noise from the wind and rain last night. Turns out pieces of the house that allow air in were loose. J crawled around in the attic and fixed the problem. Such a handy guy.
Birthdays - S&S are both August babies so we had dinner and cake last night at S&Ls place to celebrate. I did a great job barbecuing and burned the first bunch of hotdogs. Thankfully burgers take longer to cook so all was not lost. I seem to remember we were at the cottage around this time last year celebrating these birthdays by getting really drunk and skinny dipping. How things change....
Getting ready - There are things you can do to naturally induce labour. Ever since I hit 37 weeks, which is considered full term, I've been trying these things. Who knows if it's helping or if I'll be late no matter what I do. Either way, I've been drinking raspberry leaf tea, eating pineapple, eating spicy food, walking more, and some other things I'd rather not mention (but if you're really curious, do a Google search on the topic). What I've noticed is that my Braxton-Hicks contractions (practice contractions) have gotten more powerful and more frequent and I have a lot of pressure/pain down low. Last night, I felt off so I went to bed and just lay there thinking "If this is labour, we're not ready." About an hour later, I felt normal again and fell asleep. Today we went and got the playpen, where baby will likely sleep for the first bit (days to weeks to months, depending on things) and the diaper bag. I have things put aside for the hospital bag and have talked to our families about not coming to the hospital (we don't plan to be there long). A couple more things to do and organize and likely wash and then we will be completely ready. And when I say 'completely ready' I mean 'as ready as we'll ever be' for this life-altering event. J really wants to meet our squirming little man.
Wednesday, August 26
Coming up
Saturday was a strange day. I felt chained to the house and then felt silly for feeling that way. The chances of me going into labour were so slim that staying home avoiding it was probably not necessary. I'll probably go way late now. But that's okay, no baby without J here. That would not have been good.
But here we are, days later and still no baby. That will be part of every blog post until B-Day I'm sure. But please don't go thinking I've popped if I don't post in a while. I'm bad at updating and you know that.
I went to see my midwife yesterday. The baby is measuring even smaller than before so I have an ultrasound tomorrow. She's almost positive everything is okay, but there's a small enough chance that it isn't hence the test. It will be nice to see our "little squirming man", as J likes to say, one more time before the big day. I can't help worrying just a little though.
So the Halifax wedding. It was J's cousin G's wedding and apparently a ton of fun. I wish I could have been there and I think we might be making a trip to the East coast next summer because J didn't get a chance to see his old neighbourhood like he wanted.
Another wedding coming up this weekend on the East coast, New Brunswick this time for L&S. Sorry to miss this one too. I'm sure it will be beautiful.
Weddings and babies. Tis the season.
But here we are, days later and still no baby. That will be part of every blog post until B-Day I'm sure. But please don't go thinking I've popped if I don't post in a while. I'm bad at updating and you know that.
I went to see my midwife yesterday. The baby is measuring even smaller than before so I have an ultrasound tomorrow. She's almost positive everything is okay, but there's a small enough chance that it isn't hence the test. It will be nice to see our "little squirming man", as J likes to say, one more time before the big day. I can't help worrying just a little though.
So the Halifax wedding. It was J's cousin G's wedding and apparently a ton of fun. I wish I could have been there and I think we might be making a trip to the East coast next summer because J didn't get a chance to see his old neighbourhood like he wanted.
Another wedding coming up this weekend on the East coast, New Brunswick this time for L&S. Sorry to miss this one too. I'm sure it will be beautiful.
Weddings and babies. Tis the season.
Saturday, August 22
So nice
I have to write about how supportive everyone has been and especially about today. I just got home from dropping J off at the airport. His cousin is getting married in Halifax today, hopefully before hurricane Bill hits, and we decided he would fly out, go to the wedding and come home. He'll be gone less than 24 hours.
I'm considered full term in that I've reached the number of weeks that a baby is considered fully cooked and labour could happen pretty much any time. The thing is, statistically, first babies are born on average 8 days after their due date. That's not until September 11. There is little chance that baby is coming today or tomorrow or even in the next couple of weeks.
But that didn't stop a bunch of people from calling to let me know that they would be available every minute that J is out of town. Cell phones on and ready. Just in case something were to happen. I feel like I have a whole army waiting for my call. It's nice and reassuring.
I will still be doing absolutely nothing today that will induce labour. In fact, I think I hear the couch calling my name... have a great weekend!
I'm considered full term in that I've reached the number of weeks that a baby is considered fully cooked and labour could happen pretty much any time. The thing is, statistically, first babies are born on average 8 days after their due date. That's not until September 11. There is little chance that baby is coming today or tomorrow or even in the next couple of weeks.
But that didn't stop a bunch of people from calling to let me know that they would be available every minute that J is out of town. Cell phones on and ready. Just in case something were to happen. I feel like I have a whole army waiting for my call. It's nice and reassuring.
I will still be doing absolutely nothing today that will induce labour. In fact, I think I hear the couch calling my name... have a great weekend!
Friday, August 21
All over the place
I hope no one minds if I just kind of empty my brain here on this blog. I have so many thoughts swirling around but no drive to make a coherent post (if that was even possible) out of a topic or two. Or three. Or ten.
Monday night I slept on and off and on and off, but it wasn't the interrupted kind of sleep that makes you mad. I was wide awake between sleeps and thinking about all sorts of things and it hit me. I had an epiphany. I can totally do this pregnancy thing and I will totally be able to do labour and delivery. And, while we're on the topic, I can be a good mother. Where did it all come from? I'm not sure exactly, but I'm sure. Positive actually, and it's a nice feeling. I finally feel ready.
Also, I've been wanting a drug-free labour and delivery. Not because I'm against drugs or am a granola-crunching flower child. I just think that, without complications, my body should be able to handle the birth of the baby it created. And why not? This is what I was built to do. Have you seen my hips? J and I joke that my hips don't lie (like Shakira's don't) because they're so wide. And what's really nice is that J is completely on board, which is an unbelievable relief since he's going to be my "labour partner" and the one urging me on during the entire event, and the midwife is confident in me too. It's nice being told by a professional that my labour will go smoothly and I shouldn't have any problems.
It's a weird thing that a lot of this confidence I have in my body came from my miscarriage. Miscarriages aren't pleasant but they often happen spontaneously and for reasons that are natural. I wasn't smoking crack but there was obviously something wrong with that pregnancy. Wrong enough that my body decided to stop the whole thing. Who knows what problems the baby might have had if my body hadn't done that. And my body did it very efficiently. It was early on, it was painless, it was quick and complete. I was telling doctors I had miscarried before they could tell me, even with all the technology available to them. If my body can get handle that so well, why not a full-term pregnancy? And to be honest, so far my body has handled pregnancy well. Sure I've had my share of complaints, but not serious ones. I've been very lucky.
I recently read Mind Over Labor which is a book all about getting through labour using visualization. I'm not great at guided relaxation but I think I can use a lot of the techniques from the book. The author compares childbirth to playing sports - ah! I can relate to that! - and other, usual, daily events in life. It all makes sense. The other book I'm reading is the Guide to Breastfeeding and is written by a Canadian. J was given The Birth Partner to read. He just started but is serious about doing everything he can to help me (how lucky am I?) so he'll get through it. He already stopped reading to read some bits out loud to me.
We got these books from our midwife. I have to say again how happy I am to have a midwife. It's so nice going there, sitting on a couch and talking about random things before getting down to business. It's nice getting personal care and getting to know the medical professionals that will be there on B-Day. It's nice being told that since I'm tall I'm carrying the baby well and that looking small isn't a problem. Measuring small isn't a problem. Baby is a good size and already in position. I'm doing a great job! I would recommend midwifery care to anyone who is pregnant, at least take the time to read about midwives to decide if it's an option for you.
We went and saw the pictures A took of me and J last Friday. They turned out really really well. It's going to be nice to have professional shots to remind us how we looked at this time, me especially, with an incredibly big-for-me belly. Between then and last night, A learned about rim lighting, a technique to create silhouettes, which make a pregnant woman look really good (in my opinion) so we tried some of those last night. I'm still getting over the fact that I was stripped down to my little underwear in front of people other than J and being photographed. But the shots turned out really well. Like I said, the curves of the breast, the belly and then the leg look really amazing using this technique. A, you are a genius!
J and I learned in our prenatal class that when the baby engages - moves down into the pelvis - often you can see a significant difference in how the woman is carrying. You will be able to notice her belly is lower than before. I never had the super high up belly but we decided to try tracing it anyways. A week and a half ago was the first tracing and earlier this week was the second. The big part of my belly is in the same spot but there's a bump lower down where the baby's head is (strange!) and my belly has gone out a whole inch! After this is all done, I'll take a picture and show you. Incredible the difference a week makes at this stage.
And, to end this random post, a story from McDonalds. J and I went to McDonalds for dinner last night. Who doesn't love some grease? We went to sit down in a booth and, let me remind you that this is McDonalds and not some fancy restaurant catering to the wealthy. I didn't fit! My belly was too big and I didn't fit between the back of the booth and the table! What do men with potbellies do? I'm not THAT big! We sat at a table with movable chairs. Ug.
Tomorrow J flies to Halifax for his cousin's wedding. Body, even if you've never listened to me before, please don't go into labour until at least Sunday.
Monday night I slept on and off and on and off, but it wasn't the interrupted kind of sleep that makes you mad. I was wide awake between sleeps and thinking about all sorts of things and it hit me. I had an epiphany. I can totally do this pregnancy thing and I will totally be able to do labour and delivery. And, while we're on the topic, I can be a good mother. Where did it all come from? I'm not sure exactly, but I'm sure. Positive actually, and it's a nice feeling. I finally feel ready.
Also, I've been wanting a drug-free labour and delivery. Not because I'm against drugs or am a granola-crunching flower child. I just think that, without complications, my body should be able to handle the birth of the baby it created. And why not? This is what I was built to do. Have you seen my hips? J and I joke that my hips don't lie (like Shakira's don't) because they're so wide. And what's really nice is that J is completely on board, which is an unbelievable relief since he's going to be my "labour partner" and the one urging me on during the entire event, and the midwife is confident in me too. It's nice being told by a professional that my labour will go smoothly and I shouldn't have any problems.
It's a weird thing that a lot of this confidence I have in my body came from my miscarriage. Miscarriages aren't pleasant but they often happen spontaneously and for reasons that are natural. I wasn't smoking crack but there was obviously something wrong with that pregnancy. Wrong enough that my body decided to stop the whole thing. Who knows what problems the baby might have had if my body hadn't done that. And my body did it very efficiently. It was early on, it was painless, it was quick and complete. I was telling doctors I had miscarried before they could tell me, even with all the technology available to them. If my body can get handle that so well, why not a full-term pregnancy? And to be honest, so far my body has handled pregnancy well. Sure I've had my share of complaints, but not serious ones. I've been very lucky.
I recently read Mind Over Labor which is a book all about getting through labour using visualization. I'm not great at guided relaxation but I think I can use a lot of the techniques from the book. The author compares childbirth to playing sports - ah! I can relate to that! - and other, usual, daily events in life. It all makes sense. The other book I'm reading is the Guide to Breastfeeding and is written by a Canadian. J was given The Birth Partner to read. He just started but is serious about doing everything he can to help me (how lucky am I?) so he'll get through it. He already stopped reading to read some bits out loud to me.
We got these books from our midwife. I have to say again how happy I am to have a midwife. It's so nice going there, sitting on a couch and talking about random things before getting down to business. It's nice getting personal care and getting to know the medical professionals that will be there on B-Day. It's nice being told that since I'm tall I'm carrying the baby well and that looking small isn't a problem. Measuring small isn't a problem. Baby is a good size and already in position. I'm doing a great job! I would recommend midwifery care to anyone who is pregnant, at least take the time to read about midwives to decide if it's an option for you.
We went and saw the pictures A took of me and J last Friday. They turned out really really well. It's going to be nice to have professional shots to remind us how we looked at this time, me especially, with an incredibly big-for-me belly. Between then and last night, A learned about rim lighting, a technique to create silhouettes, which make a pregnant woman look really good (in my opinion) so we tried some of those last night. I'm still getting over the fact that I was stripped down to my little underwear in front of people other than J and being photographed. But the shots turned out really well. Like I said, the curves of the breast, the belly and then the leg look really amazing using this technique. A, you are a genius!
J and I learned in our prenatal class that when the baby engages - moves down into the pelvis - often you can see a significant difference in how the woman is carrying. You will be able to notice her belly is lower than before. I never had the super high up belly but we decided to try tracing it anyways. A week and a half ago was the first tracing and earlier this week was the second. The big part of my belly is in the same spot but there's a bump lower down where the baby's head is (strange!) and my belly has gone out a whole inch! After this is all done, I'll take a picture and show you. Incredible the difference a week makes at this stage.
And, to end this random post, a story from McDonalds. J and I went to McDonalds for dinner last night. Who doesn't love some grease? We went to sit down in a booth and, let me remind you that this is McDonalds and not some fancy restaurant catering to the wealthy. I didn't fit! My belly was too big and I didn't fit between the back of the booth and the table! What do men with potbellies do? I'm not THAT big! We sat at a table with movable chairs. Ug.
Tomorrow J flies to Halifax for his cousin's wedding. Body, even if you've never listened to me before, please don't go into labour until at least Sunday.
Sunday, August 16
Not a good hermit
My big plan for yesterday was to not leave the house. I managed just fine until late afternoon when J, implying that the bad things that happened when I did leave the house were petty and small and insignificant and only mattered to me because I'm a hormonal wreck, decided we were going shopping. J does NOT like to shop so I have to take advantage of these rare moments of weakness when he thinks shopping is a good idea. Plus I had spent most of the day huddled in the safety of my own house, free of toxic bugs and police cars and whatever else was out there to get me.
We went to Sleepy Hollow to look at cribs. It was closing in under an hour so we made our way around the huge showroom, quickly passing cribs that were way too much money, but finding a nice one that wasn't incredibly expensive. And it came with a mattress. And it matches the wood on the bed and dresser already in the room. And they'll deliver it for free. And bam! We bought a crib! It's being delivered Wednesday afternoon. Another reason for me to stay home for half a day.
After that we went to Walmart - again, J's idea and who am I to argue. The trip wasn't bad, in and out really, but we didn't get anything. Then we went to Babies R Us and basically cleared up the rest of our registry. It was a good BRU experience because we didn't have to deal with the staff at all. We've found that they are generally hard to find and not helpful when you do find them. We got a monitor and a contoured change pad and some sheets and other little things. Babies do need stuff. You should see the room now. It's crazy and now I have tons of laundry to do.
We had left SJ's car at J's parent's place Friday before heading to A&S's so we went there. His parents were home from the cottage and graciously let us eat half the pizza they had for dinner. We went through the pictures from the big cottage reunion weekend but I had to quit early. Apparently toxic bug sickness may be an actual cold or flu and I was not feeling well. I took our car and made J, in SJ's car, stop and get some orange juice. I think I lasted until 9pm. I slept for 11 hours and am feeling a little better today.
Today's plans are still up in the air though I just may start with some laundry. I have a room full to do.
We went to Sleepy Hollow to look at cribs. It was closing in under an hour so we made our way around the huge showroom, quickly passing cribs that were way too much money, but finding a nice one that wasn't incredibly expensive. And it came with a mattress. And it matches the wood on the bed and dresser already in the room. And they'll deliver it for free. And bam! We bought a crib! It's being delivered Wednesday afternoon. Another reason for me to stay home for half a day.
After that we went to Walmart - again, J's idea and who am I to argue. The trip wasn't bad, in and out really, but we didn't get anything. Then we went to Babies R Us and basically cleared up the rest of our registry. It was a good BRU experience because we didn't have to deal with the staff at all. We've found that they are generally hard to find and not helpful when you do find them. We got a monitor and a contoured change pad and some sheets and other little things. Babies do need stuff. You should see the room now. It's crazy and now I have tons of laundry to do.
We had left SJ's car at J's parent's place Friday before heading to A&S's so we went there. His parents were home from the cottage and graciously let us eat half the pizza they had for dinner. We went through the pictures from the big cottage reunion weekend but I had to quit early. Apparently toxic bug sickness may be an actual cold or flu and I was not feeling well. I took our car and made J, in SJ's car, stop and get some orange juice. I think I lasted until 9pm. I slept for 11 hours and am feeling a little better today.
Today's plans are still up in the air though I just may start with some laundry. I have a room full to do.
Saturday, August 15
Done
Late last night I decided I didn't want to leave the house today. Yesterday was a rough day - definitely had it's good parts, but overall it was draining.
This was by far the busiest week I've had since I stopped working. And even when I was still working, I was getting to bed earlier than I did all week and managing alright. This week though, blech, I'm glad it's over.
Thursday night was my last baby shower with my baseball girls. It was really nice to see them and eat good food and play silly games. I got home really late. Sleepy J made a comment from bed about being glad I wasn't dead. I should have called. I slept on the couch in the basement so he could get good sleep (he hasn't been sleeping well) so waking up just after 4am in the basement by myself was disorienting but not the end of the world. I slept about as well as I've been sleeping lately - not great but not terrible.
I took Friday to vacuum the house. I got my hair cut and then grabbed J from his parent's house so we could go to A&S's place for dinner and my photo shoot. For some reason, right after we got in the car, I completely lost it... oh right, when J was getting in the car, he bonked my head and I bit my tongue. Nothing, right? Not when you're 8.5 months pregnant. I teared up, pulled over and got him to drive. I cried most of the way across town. Thank you, hormones.
Dinner was nice and the photo shoot was a success. I will never again yell at the girls on the Top Model shows when they struggle through photo shoots. I found it incredibly hard but thankfully A was a great coach and I'm sure the pictures turned out great. (His website.) On the way to the park where we did half the shoot, a bug flew right down my throat. I managed to cough it up and then chomp on it. It was toxic and my throat is still sore. I looked at it with a flashlight when I got home and sure enough there are white spots and red irritated skin. No wonder I've been craving orange juice.
Being physically exhausted, feeling sick from the toxic bug, and other things led to another break down as soon as I got into bed. I'm hoping today will be better, but I may not leave the house. Hormones be damned!
This was by far the busiest week I've had since I stopped working. And even when I was still working, I was getting to bed earlier than I did all week and managing alright. This week though, blech, I'm glad it's over.
Thursday night was my last baby shower with my baseball girls. It was really nice to see them and eat good food and play silly games. I got home really late. Sleepy J made a comment from bed about being glad I wasn't dead. I should have called. I slept on the couch in the basement so he could get good sleep (he hasn't been sleeping well) so waking up just after 4am in the basement by myself was disorienting but not the end of the world. I slept about as well as I've been sleeping lately - not great but not terrible.
I took Friday to vacuum the house. I got my hair cut and then grabbed J from his parent's house so we could go to A&S's place for dinner and my photo shoot. For some reason, right after we got in the car, I completely lost it... oh right, when J was getting in the car, he bonked my head and I bit my tongue. Nothing, right? Not when you're 8.5 months pregnant. I teared up, pulled over and got him to drive. I cried most of the way across town. Thank you, hormones.
Dinner was nice and the photo shoot was a success. I will never again yell at the girls on the Top Model shows when they struggle through photo shoots. I found it incredibly hard but thankfully A was a great coach and I'm sure the pictures turned out great. (His website.) On the way to the park where we did half the shoot, a bug flew right down my throat. I managed to cough it up and then chomp on it. It was toxic and my throat is still sore. I looked at it with a flashlight when I got home and sure enough there are white spots and red irritated skin. No wonder I've been craving orange juice.
Being physically exhausted, feeling sick from the toxic bug, and other things led to another break down as soon as I got into bed. I'm hoping today will be better, but I may not leave the house. Hormones be damned!
Thursday, August 13
Busy week - proud and not so proud moments
This week has been incredibly busy. I had/have plans every night but one and it's tiring me out. I'm not sleeping like a champ anymore and have a hard time fitting in naps. Imagine if I was still working....
Sunday afternoon, SW hosted a baby shower for me. It was pretty low key - only 7 people including me, but it was really nice. We talked, ate, played games (that didn't make me look or feel stupid) and I opened presents. People are SO generous. Being pregnant has shown me that, over and over. So, thank you to everyone who came out and to A&S for hosting. (Proud.)
I was lucky to also see pictures from A&S's big biking trip and hear about S's near-death experience. Crazy times.
I was out of the house most of the day and finally came home to J. He had fended for himself and made some incredibly good chicken wings with a recipe from L&S(B).
Monday I swam (Proud.) and we had our third prenatal class at night. The class was good - we learned about comfort measures and pain management options. I demo'd one of the comfort measures in front of the class. I stood up and the instructor asked how far along I was. People gasped when I said 36 and a half weeks. One poor girl had her partner ask if that made her feel bad (J said she was much bigger than me and not as far along) (Not proud.) J liked the demo because he thinks the instructor is pretty. We learned a lot and I'm liking all the options available, though I still would like to attempt labour and delivery without medication. Why not try? (Proud.)
Tuesday was my off night with nothing scheduled which turned out to be a good thing because I was so tired. We met our second midwife in the afternoon and found out that things are still looking good: my blood pressure is good, I gained 1.5 pounds over the past 2 weeks (putting my weight gain so far at 29.5 pounds) (Proud.), baby's heart beat is good, baby is still head down (Proud.) and already partially engaged (awesome!) We were both able to feel the little head - incredible! We were given homework. I haven't done any of it yet. (Not proud.)
Wednesday (yesterday) I went to S&L's for lunch and to hang out with baby R again. I also got to meet S's parents who are in town for a little while. Baby R looks pretty much the same but is keeping S&L up more so than last week. Both S and the baby had naps while I was over. This time I didn't get peed on! (Proud.)
Last night, I went across town to have dinner with all the ladies on my dad's side of the family. Eight of us gathered at Biagio's, a little Italian restaurant, and ate and drank (water for me!) Again, I was so surprised with everyone's generosity because I opened so many presents. My little kid is going to be clothed for the next year without any help from me. (Proud.)
Today I really wanted to have a good day. I got some things done and decided to go swimming at the outdoor pool since it's so hot out. I got pulled over for speeding on my way (Not proud.) but the ticket was knocked down and I only have a fine to pay (Somewhat proud.) The cop seriously seemed to feel bad and even asked if it was the hormones. I said it definitely wasn't considering I was driving the way I always do on that road. (Not lying to a cop or crying to get out of the ticket = Proud.)
I got to the pool, ran into JP and found out the pool was closed for unknown reasons. I went to the indoor pool where I normally swim and managed to get in my 20 laps. I think I'm starting to slow down because I didn't feel as good as I did Monday or last week (Not proud.) Oh well.
Now I'm home and trying to relax before heading out tonight. There's a get together with the baseball girls who I didn't see much of this summer since I wasn't playing. It'll be a good time as long as I can stay awake!
Tomorrow's big plans are to get my hair cut and to do a photo shoot with A. I'm quite looking forward to it and have been gathering ideas for shots.
Oh! Almost forgot: today my baby is officially full term (37 weeks). I have incubated this little guy for the past eight and a half months and he's ready to go any time now. (Proud.) I wouldn't mind him coming a little early but coming on the due date of September 3rd wouldn't be a bad thing. I tried so hard to not get attached to that date, but it happened. Slowly, over time. Either way, we're looking at B-Day being sometime in the next 4 weeks. Crazy!
Sunday afternoon, SW hosted a baby shower for me. It was pretty low key - only 7 people including me, but it was really nice. We talked, ate, played games (that didn't make me look or feel stupid) and I opened presents. People are SO generous. Being pregnant has shown me that, over and over. So, thank you to everyone who came out and to A&S for hosting. (Proud.)
I was lucky to also see pictures from A&S's big biking trip and hear about S's near-death experience. Crazy times.
I was out of the house most of the day and finally came home to J. He had fended for himself and made some incredibly good chicken wings with a recipe from L&S(B).
Monday I swam (Proud.) and we had our third prenatal class at night. The class was good - we learned about comfort measures and pain management options. I demo'd one of the comfort measures in front of the class. I stood up and the instructor asked how far along I was. People gasped when I said 36 and a half weeks. One poor girl had her partner ask if that made her feel bad (J said she was much bigger than me and not as far along) (Not proud.) J liked the demo because he thinks the instructor is pretty. We learned a lot and I'm liking all the options available, though I still would like to attempt labour and delivery without medication. Why not try? (Proud.)
Tuesday was my off night with nothing scheduled which turned out to be a good thing because I was so tired. We met our second midwife in the afternoon and found out that things are still looking good: my blood pressure is good, I gained 1.5 pounds over the past 2 weeks (putting my weight gain so far at 29.5 pounds) (Proud.), baby's heart beat is good, baby is still head down (Proud.) and already partially engaged (awesome!) We were both able to feel the little head - incredible! We were given homework. I haven't done any of it yet. (Not proud.)
Wednesday (yesterday) I went to S&L's for lunch and to hang out with baby R again. I also got to meet S's parents who are in town for a little while. Baby R looks pretty much the same but is keeping S&L up more so than last week. Both S and the baby had naps while I was over. This time I didn't get peed on! (Proud.)
Last night, I went across town to have dinner with all the ladies on my dad's side of the family. Eight of us gathered at Biagio's, a little Italian restaurant, and ate and drank (water for me!) Again, I was so surprised with everyone's generosity because I opened so many presents. My little kid is going to be clothed for the next year without any help from me. (Proud.)
Today I really wanted to have a good day. I got some things done and decided to go swimming at the outdoor pool since it's so hot out. I got pulled over for speeding on my way (Not proud.) but the ticket was knocked down and I only have a fine to pay (Somewhat proud.) The cop seriously seemed to feel bad and even asked if it was the hormones. I said it definitely wasn't considering I was driving the way I always do on that road. (Not lying to a cop or crying to get out of the ticket = Proud.)
I got to the pool, ran into JP and found out the pool was closed for unknown reasons. I went to the indoor pool where I normally swim and managed to get in my 20 laps. I think I'm starting to slow down because I didn't feel as good as I did Monday or last week (Not proud.) Oh well.
Now I'm home and trying to relax before heading out tonight. There's a get together with the baseball girls who I didn't see much of this summer since I wasn't playing. It'll be a good time as long as I can stay awake!
Tomorrow's big plans are to get my hair cut and to do a photo shoot with A. I'm quite looking forward to it and have been gathering ideas for shots.
Oh! Almost forgot: today my baby is officially full term (37 weeks). I have incubated this little guy for the past eight and a half months and he's ready to go any time now. (Proud.) I wouldn't mind him coming a little early but coming on the due date of September 3rd wouldn't be a bad thing. I tried so hard to not get attached to that date, but it happened. Slowly, over time. Either way, we're looking at B-Day being sometime in the next 4 weeks. Crazy!
Saturday, August 8
Playing Catch-Up
J Family Reunion Weekend
Last Friday I picked J up from work at lunch time so we could head to the cottage. Almost 25 family members gathered for the weekend reunion. There were games and cheating and swimming and knee boarding and volleyball and eating and lounging and napping and sailing and raining and laughing and turtle hunting. It was a jam-packed weekend and my only complaint was that I turned orange because of the iron-rich water.
Each family was responsible was dinner one night so meals were taken care of - we ate really well. I'd like to say that we slept well but we didn't. Me because I'm the size of a whale and J because he was sharing the 3/4 bed with a whale. But it cooled off every night so I wasn't the uncomfortable sweaty mess I thought it would be.
Everyone was given a duty. I was official photographer and I think I did a good job. We have hundreds of pictures from the 5 days and J was a sweetheart and went through them to make a manageable amount to send around. Family, they are coming soon.
Congratulations S&L!
Monday afternoon I received a text message from L saying that she had her baby. No details so I texted back demanding she call me. I couldn't stand the suspense. Baby R was born early early Sunday morning and after having seen the pictures and held the little guy Wednesday, I can confirm he's adorable. S&L seem to be doing well and adapting to life as proud parents of the baby who took a massive dump right after being born. Massive.
I have now held a three-day-old baby and only got peed on once. It makes me a little more anxious for my little baby, but I can wait a month for that.
Back in the water
Thursday and Friday I swam. Indoors, but still, it was incredibly nice to be back in the water and to be getting some exercise. I slept better the past two nights because of it.
Extras
It's nice being home after having been at the cottage for 5 days. And to have a weekend so soon after (meaning J is around) is nice too. Sandy was super happy to see us and purrs with more gusto than before. All we have to do is desert her for a bit and she loves us extra when we get home.
My days are starting to fill up. Lots of things to do and people to see. It's typical for the summer but tiring for me.
At least today is a day full of no plans and no rush to do them. A nice little Saturday.
Last Friday I picked J up from work at lunch time so we could head to the cottage. Almost 25 family members gathered for the weekend reunion. There were games and cheating and swimming and knee boarding and volleyball and eating and lounging and napping and sailing and raining and laughing and turtle hunting. It was a jam-packed weekend and my only complaint was that I turned orange because of the iron-rich water.
Each family was responsible was dinner one night so meals were taken care of - we ate really well. I'd like to say that we slept well but we didn't. Me because I'm the size of a whale and J because he was sharing the 3/4 bed with a whale. But it cooled off every night so I wasn't the uncomfortable sweaty mess I thought it would be.
Everyone was given a duty. I was official photographer and I think I did a good job. We have hundreds of pictures from the 5 days and J was a sweetheart and went through them to make a manageable amount to send around. Family, they are coming soon.
Congratulations S&L!
Monday afternoon I received a text message from L saying that she had her baby. No details so I texted back demanding she call me. I couldn't stand the suspense. Baby R was born early early Sunday morning and after having seen the pictures and held the little guy Wednesday, I can confirm he's adorable. S&L seem to be doing well and adapting to life as proud parents of the baby who took a massive dump right after being born. Massive.
I have now held a three-day-old baby and only got peed on once. It makes me a little more anxious for my little baby, but I can wait a month for that.
Back in the water
Thursday and Friday I swam. Indoors, but still, it was incredibly nice to be back in the water and to be getting some exercise. I slept better the past two nights because of it.
Extras
It's nice being home after having been at the cottage for 5 days. And to have a weekend so soon after (meaning J is around) is nice too. Sandy was super happy to see us and purrs with more gusto than before. All we have to do is desert her for a bit and she loves us extra when we get home.
My days are starting to fill up. Lots of things to do and people to see. It's typical for the summer but tiring for me.
At least today is a day full of no plans and no rush to do them. A nice little Saturday.
Thursday, July 30
Swimming, version 2.0
I've been swimming at a local pool for the past two months. My goal was to go often enough to make buying a 3-month pass worth it. I can't remember what that worked out to, and I could go crunch the numbers again if I wanted, but I'm not going to.
My big plan was to try and swim three times a week since I can't run anymore. I've gone that often only a couple of weeks but that's okay. I'm getting used to swimming and can see that I'm actually getting some exercise, mostly because I'm incredibly hungry after I've swam and I almost always need a nap that day.
Being off work has helped get me to the pool more often. And being in the water feels good because I can forget the extra weight I'm carrying around.
Last week I went and saw my baseball team play. I talked to my friend JP who is a teacher and is off for the summer. She said she'd like to come swimming with me and found out that an outdoor pool near her has lane swimming. She went for the first time this week - I couldn't go with her because of a lunch date with L, but I went to the pool today by myself.
Swimming outside is awesome! Part of being pregnant and having a huge belly is that my back never sees the sun. Well it does when I'm swimming! Two birds with one stone. I think I'm a convert. Plus, being outside, it doesn't smell or feel as toxic as swimming at an indoor pool. I'm quite pleased.
I'm hoping to go at least once next week - no judging, we're at the cottage tomorrow until Wednesday and I have a date either Thursday or Friday next week at lunch already - and then regularly after that.
My big plan was to try and swim three times a week since I can't run anymore. I've gone that often only a couple of weeks but that's okay. I'm getting used to swimming and can see that I'm actually getting some exercise, mostly because I'm incredibly hungry after I've swam and I almost always need a nap that day.
Being off work has helped get me to the pool more often. And being in the water feels good because I can forget the extra weight I'm carrying around.
Last week I went and saw my baseball team play. I talked to my friend JP who is a teacher and is off for the summer. She said she'd like to come swimming with me and found out that an outdoor pool near her has lane swimming. She went for the first time this week - I couldn't go with her because of a lunch date with L, but I went to the pool today by myself.
Swimming outside is awesome! Part of being pregnant and having a huge belly is that my back never sees the sun. Well it does when I'm swimming! Two birds with one stone. I think I'm a convert. Plus, being outside, it doesn't smell or feel as toxic as swimming at an indoor pool. I'm quite pleased.
I'm hoping to go at least once next week - no judging, we're at the cottage tomorrow until Wednesday and I have a date either Thursday or Friday next week at lunch already - and then regularly after that.
Wednesday, July 29
Classes
J and I signed up for prenatal classes that are offered by the Ottawa Childbirth Education Association in our neighbourhood. They go for 2 hours every Monday night for 6 weeks. Six weeks brings us to the first week of September, which, if you've been paying attention, is the same week I'm due. I'm sure we'll make it because this baby is going to keep cooking until full term.
We had our second class this past Monday night and I'm happy to say that we're happy with them so far. I'm happy because we're both learning stuff. J is happy because our instructor is a very pretty woman.
There are 9 other couples in the class with varying due dates. There's us, at the beginning of September, the least pregnant couple due in December and everyone else somewhere in between. I'd like to say I'm the biggest girl there, belly-wise, but I'm not. I hear all the time how small I am and it would really get to me if I didn't know that it's okay. If I didn't know that the baby inside of me might be small but he's getting bigger every week.
There are so many things people worry about on a regular basis, but so many more when you're pregnant. Add to regular worry, a ton of crazy person hormones and a lack of sleep and you just might see some tears. The past 8 months have been an emotional roller coaster but I wouldn't change it for the world. Just don't tell me I'm too small.
We had our second class this past Monday night and I'm happy to say that we're happy with them so far. I'm happy because we're both learning stuff. J is happy because our instructor is a very pretty woman.
There are 9 other couples in the class with varying due dates. There's us, at the beginning of September, the least pregnant couple due in December and everyone else somewhere in between. I'd like to say I'm the biggest girl there, belly-wise, but I'm not. I hear all the time how small I am and it would really get to me if I didn't know that it's okay. If I didn't know that the baby inside of me might be small but he's getting bigger every week.
There are so many things people worry about on a regular basis, but so many more when you're pregnant. Add to regular worry, a ton of crazy person hormones and a lack of sleep and you just might see some tears. The past 8 months have been an emotional roller coaster but I wouldn't change it for the world. Just don't tell me I'm too small.
Friday, July 24
Fun with the cat
I was upstairs in the kitchen. J called up to me: "Sandy is having a great time!" Oh no, what is he doing to my cat, I wondered.
J was pushing the new stroller around the basement with Sandy in it. She was curious but wobbly while he wheeled between the couches and the coffee table.
She's being such a good sport and the stroller isn't the only thing J's put her in. He picked up the snugly and started looking around for her. He found her and grabbed her and put her in. She had one foot sticking out at a weird angle but didn't resist. He walked around for a while with her on his chest, looking pleased with himself. It was quite the sight.
I think someone's getting excited.
J was pushing the new stroller around the basement with Sandy in it. She was curious but wobbly while he wheeled between the couches and the coffee table.
She's being such a good sport and the stroller isn't the only thing J's put her in. He picked up the snugly and started looking around for her. He found her and grabbed her and put her in. She had one foot sticking out at a weird angle but didn't resist. He walked around for a while with her on his chest, looking pleased with himself. It was quite the sight.
I think someone's getting excited.
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